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Joke of the Day

"Policeman: Why didn't you stop at that red light? Motorist: Then you would have caught up with me."

"""Welcome to another meeting of Horse Club. Let's try to actually get something done today. All in favor?"" Crowd: ""NEIGH!"" ""Jesus Christ."""

"This salad isn't going to toss itself. *winks* - Things you shouldn't say as you pass food around the Thanksgiving table :("

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to beat the room for being black and one to arrest the light bulb for being broke."

"Look at the name 'Morgan Freeman' and then TRY not to read things in Morgan Freeman's voice. See? You can't."

"Golf, except there's no balls or clubs or anything, and you just drive around in a cart and drink."

"If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world."

"Did you hear there was a blackout last night? Don't worry, we caught him"

"I named my dog WiFi Because I stole it from my neighbor"

"Hey Dad? Can you sing me the Alphabet? Sure, ""abcdefghiJK."""