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Joke of the Day

"How does a flight of steps check out a woman? It stares."

"Today my wife was on her knees before me. ...screaming: ""Don't you hide under the bed, asshole!"""

"TIL sperm donors are paid $50 per donation. It was devastating. Imagine all the money that has slipped through my fingers."

"Ad a German i often hear some say we have a bad humor .... last time someone actually told me, he got burned with the other jews telling me. Edit: Damn it phone it is as and not ad ._."

"My wife refused to do anal. She said she had a Boo-T-I."

"I think it's pretty cool how the Chinese made a language... ...entirely out of tattoos."

"Did you hear about the guy who liked to stab himself in the eye? After a while, he stopped seeing the point."

"Feel free to use the ""or less"" feature of your 140 characters."

"10 years ago, I asked the girl of my dreams out on a date. Today, I asked her to marry me! She said no both times. ( )"

"Bi-Polar Bears usually attack without warning, then sob for hours while eating leftover walrus."