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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between Jelly and Jam? I can't jelly my dick into your girls ass."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? KANYE WEST - Beyonce should have crossed the road, not the chicken!"

"If your opinion about global warming is based on the weather outside then you don't deserve to have an opinion about global warming"

"I'm upset b/c 2011 marks yet another year my birthday will not fall on Friday the 13th. I guess that's what I get for being born on May 3rd."

"How do you know if somebody does crossfit? They are probably in better shape than you."

"what do you call a sad ditch? a depression."

"When you get angry at someone count out loud to ten. When you get to eight, throw a punch. Nobody expects that shit."

"A pedophile was taking a small child into the woods at night.... The kid say, ""These woods are really scary"". The pedophile replies with, ""You're telling me, iv'e got to walk out of here alone""."

"I haven't swam competitively since I was a sperm."

"What is another difference between a circus and a whorehouse? My husband doesn't go to the circus"