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Joke of the Day

"Do you know what a 9V battery and an asshole have in common? No matter how hard you try, you're eventually going to press your tongue to it."

"Remember: Being awake during a Saturday Morning sunrise is a sign of a good Friday Night."

"Decided to start a business that serves beer and gives massages Gonna call it Rub and Chug"

"I entered 10 puns into a pun contest in the hope that one would win... But no pun-in-ten did."

"What's the difference between your job and a dead prostitute? Your job still sucks!"

"How many film directors does it take to change a light bulb? Just one but he wants to do it thirty-two times and when he's done everyone says that his last light bulb was much better."

"midget in the library midget walks into a library and ask do you have any books on irony? the librarian replies sure they are on the top shelf"

"An old joke, regardless its still hilarious. A cheetah would never cheat on his wife. But a Tiger Would."

"Little Johnny calls for his mom ""MOM! MOM!"" ""What is it Johnny?"" ""Does Grandma know anything about car mechanics?"" ""No, why?"" ""She's outside, under a bus"""

"Tell the Punchline first. How do you ruin a joke?"