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Joke of the Day
"Billy wanted to learn how to juggle... ...but he never had the balls to do it"
Next Joke
"My friend just told me he has a chocolate lab. Turns out it's a dog, not a place. Bummer."
"You can't put a price on slippery lemons."
"What do women and penny stocks have in common? If you hold on to them too long instead of pumping and dumping them, you'll lose all your shit."
"Life is like a dick. If it's soft, you can't beat it, but when it's hard, somebody's gonna get fucked."
"Today I Fucked Up... the couch"
"Don't you hate it when you're running on a treadmill and then your butt gets really itchy and then you over-share on the internet?"
"What's the German guy say when you kick him in teh crotch? Oof, weinerpain!"
"Two men walk into a bar.... The third one ducks."
"Honestly sometimes I STILL think about how dope it is that I don't have any homework."