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Joke of the Day

"We may not be able to call black people the N-word But we can say things like ""hey dad"" and ""have a nice day officer."""

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"What did the German clock maker say to the clock that would only go ""tick tick tick?"" Vee have vays of making you tock!"
"What do anal sex and spinach have in common If they were forced upon you as a child you wont like them as an adult"
"What's the difference between a Catholic priest and a pimple? A pimple doesn't come on a boys face until he's 13"
"Fortune Cookie: YOU JUST BROKE MY HOUSE IN HALF AND NOW YOU'RE READING MY JOURNAL"
"Best Hitler Joke That I've Heard Me: ""Hitler Killed 5 million Jews and a Penguin."" Friend: ""What? A Penguin?"" Me: ""See, no one wants to know about the Jews."""
"Did you all hear Jerry Sandusky is getting a custom ipod touch? It will be known as the itouch kids!"
"Surprisingly, the only Street Fighter II move based on one of Chuck Norris' was Chun-Li's. Chuck Norris prefers to travel by performing four upside-down double-roundhouse kicks per second."
"How do you titillate an ocelot? .... .... You oscillate its tit a lot"
"Enhanced interrogation idea: If waterboarding isn't working, try having my mother brush their hair."