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Joke of the Day

"Did you know we only use 10% of our brains? ""Actually that's a myth-"" This part is useless *stabs fork in head* See? Now florble arble guh"

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"Recently in court, I was found guilty of being egotistical I am appealing (-Stewart Francis)"
"""Son it's time we had the talk"" ""Cmon dad I know about se.."" ""Jet fuel can't melt steel beams"" ""What?"" ""It was an inside job"""
"If everything seems to be coming your way, you're probably in the wrong lane."
"Don't spell ""part"" backward! It's a trap."
"my biggest fear is ants working together to lift my house up, and bring it somewhere"
"CLICKBAIT JOKE THAT WILL MAKE YOU SAY ""Why is it deleted?"" [Deleted]"
"Any ideas for how I can repair some torn duct tape?"
"[describing criminal to sketch artist] He had the damp chest of a man with an excessive lisp. He was eating a newspaper."
"What's the hardest part of washing a vegetable? putting them back in the wheelchair"