33141

Joke of the Day

"My reddit secret santa gave me what I have really been wanting for quite some time now.... They fucked me."

"TIFU by climbing into a German U-Boat Whoops. Wrong sub."

"I just got accused of ""plagiarism"" Their words not mine!"

"Your call is important to us, we'll interrupt calming music every 30secs for the next 20mins to remind you that your call is important to us"

"How many pretty girls are there at a monastery? Nun."

"Two cannibals are eating this guy.... One of them ask, ""So, you having fun?"". The other one says ""Yeah. I'm having a ball."""

"Mike: I'm really glad I wasn't born in France. Jim: Why? Mike: I can't speak French."

"Me: [uncontrollable sobbing] I can't see you anymore. I won't let you hurt me again. Trainer: It was a sit-up. You did 1 sit-up."

"What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his arse"

"What idiot called them ""cannibals"" and not ""humanitarians""?"