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Joke of the Day

"My reddit secret santa gave me what I have really been wanting for quite some time now.... They fucked me."

"I've found out why gay people dress so well... It's because they spent so much time in the closet."

"[god on LSD creating Donald Trump What if a car alarm that constantly goes off for no reason were a person?"

"Why did the Gorilla fail English? He had little Ape-titude!"

"[being mugged] ME: can i keep things of sentimental value? ROBBER: ok ME:[pulling things from wallet] my favorite cash...my lucky debit card"

"In response to Wikipedia's ""price of a cup of coffee is all we need"" fundraiser. I like my coffee like my wikipedia. Free!"

"""I'M A DOG!"" ""I'M A DOG TOO!"" ""WE'RE DOGS!"" - dogs"

"What's the word that starts with an ""N"" that no one wants to call a black person? Neighbor"

"A drunk guy walks into a bar KLANG!"

"Red Bull gives you wings... Unless you're a unicorn. If you're a unicorn Red Bull gives you fins. .... Please tell me at least *someone* got that obscure punchline."