32268

Joke of the Day

"As a farmer I've heard lots of jokes about sheep. I told them to my dog but he'd heard them all."

"If another day goes by without a Matthew, Mark, Luke and John forming a boyband called New Testament, I'm going to give up on everything."

"There is a blonde and a zebra in a bath tub... And the blonde asks the zebra, ""can you pass the soap?"" The zebra says, ""What do you think I am? A fucking typewriter!?"""

"I just saw a poster that said ""have you seen this man?"" With a number to call... So I called the number and told them ""No."""

"With what did the scuba-diver use to cut seaweed? A sea-saw"

"Why are oil miners and police men mortal enemies? One brings black stuff and the other gets rid of it"

"Why did the mother feed her newborn lamb? Because it's baby food."

"What's ISIS's favourite band? Koran Koran."

"What did the surgeon say to his constipated patient? Cut that shit out!"

"Well, a wasp just flew into my house and I hope the fire department gets here soon."