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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I go to Subway, when they ask if I would like my sandwich toasted, I say yes & then I raise my cup of Coke & say, ""To my sandwich!"""

"I hate people who think it's cool to take drugs ...like customs officers"

"Wolverine and a lawyer walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""No claws, please!"" They both leave."

"What do you call sandpaper in Iraq? A map."

"What is the difference between a dead baby and a water melon? One's fun to hit with a sledge hammer, the other one's a water melon."

"What pillar doesn't need holding up ? A caterpillar !"

"How Do You Call 5 Black People Having Sex? Threesome."

"What's the best way to get a fat chick to have sex with you? Whoops, wrong subreddit"

"At what age do kids stop remembering how often their parents are late picking them up from school because of online poker?"

"What body movements alert you that a politician is lying? His lips are moving."