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Joke of the Day

"I was gonna make a dubstep joke... But I dropped it."

"My walls are closing in. Crawling in my skin my Cell walls are closing in? HELP!"

"It only took three years but I finally finished eating that box of taquitos from Costco."

"What do you call a crazy person wearing pantaloons? A pantalunatic."

"What's the difference between Hillary Clinton and an AR 15? One is responsible for the deaths of Americans, the other is an inanimate object."

"what did 0 say to the 8? nice belt"

"Europe. Made in Germany."

"I want to open a drinking establishment without any furniture. It'll be the best around, Bar None."

"The secret to making a good egg is the way you ap-poach it. *a man in the audience has a stroke and dies from being so angry at this joke*"

"An Ancient Roman walks into a bar.. Holds up two fingers and says ""Five glasses of wine please""."