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Joke of the Day

"I was on a date other day when the girl said she wanted to start a long distance relationship using semaphore. Raised a couple of red flags..."

"If we ate cats for lunch we could consolidate something like 85% of all Facebook photos."

"How does someone pay for a painting? With Monet"

"Short seal joke A baby seal walks into a club"

"What's the difference between a horny man and a vampire? Vampires don't come inside without permission"

"doktor: did you get a drug test? me: nah I know what I'm on"

"At an Irish wedding, someone said, ""Would all the married men stand next to the one person that has made your life worth living?"" The bartender was almost crushed to death."

"I hate when my friends stand so close to me when pictures are being taken. It's like they don't know I plan on cropping them out later."

"My Car spinning uncontrollably thru a crowd of people And My Korean friend screams ""Hit the Blakes"" & I'm like ""I can't be that selective"""

"What state was JFK when he was assassinated? A horrible state"