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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a horny man and a vampire? Vampires don't come inside without permission"

"What does Batman get in his drink? Just Ice"

"Why do pill bottles have cotton in them? To remind blacks in America that they were cotton pickers before they were drug dealers."

"If you ever hear me say that I missed you it's only because I have bad aim."

"I'd like to start today by telling you how wonderful (NAME) is. I'd like to but..."

"Concerned that hanging my daughter's artwork all over the house is sending the wrong message. Specifically that I think it's not terrible."

"I watched a gang bang video involving several bus drivers and one woman. She looked bored for half an hour, then suddenly they all came at the same time."

"What did the Math book say to the pencil? I see your point; I've got a lot of problems."

"I'm not saying I've had a lot to drink, but my foot just fell asleep so I drew dicks on it."

"There is still no cure for mornings."