30883

Joke of the Day

"Considering ""natural"" childbirth? You wouldn't have a tooth pulled without painkillers, right? This is an 8lb tooth. From your crotch."

"Son asking father. Why are niggers so black daddy? Well son, whip this one while I think about it."

"Why can't Shia Joe travel in eastern Pennsylvania? Because it's always Sunni in Philadelphia."

"Ever been so tired at work that people thought you were drunk? I hope so because that's the only excuse I have for being drunk at work."

"What is red... And smells like green paint? Red paint! Whats green, and smells like red paint? Green paint :) Can't believe how many time I switch to the second, and they don't get it!"

"My friend told me to stop singing Wonderwall I said Maaaybe"

"At first, I was merely a stock trading enthusiast... ...but now I'm fully invested."

"I booked a taxi today When it arrives I threw up a Nazi salute. I bet no one's thought of heiling a cab before"

"I'm starting a new movement that encourages people to take things one step at a time Unfortunately, it's taking a long time to catch on."

"Coworker: Are you seeing anyone? Me: Unfortunately. CW: Then why are you dating her? Me: No, I meant you're standing in front of me."