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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a place showcasing gay people in their natural environment? A queerium"

"I'm starting to feel bullied by all the anti-bullying commercials."

"Check-writing-grocery-line lady. No-turn-signal-SUV guy. Recline-seat-into-your-lap man. They're all voting tomorrow. Let's cancel them out."

"What is your favorite one to two line joke? Keep em coming boys and gals. This is making my 15 car ride way better!"

"[Mad scientist lamenting] ""All that work, trying to create a perfect palindrome ..wasted! DAMMIT I'M MAD !"" (Pauses) ""Hey...wait"

"How did the sloth become President of the tree? He slept his way to the top."

"""Putin's Assassination Attempt On Bob Costas Fails, Matt Lauer Next Target"" (Faux Onion headline. Follow on twitter @gizopizo)"

"Opposites If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?"

"My Grandma told me today that men were much more charming when she was young... I told Grandma that that was because they aren't trying to fuck her anymore."

"I like my girls like I like my coffee. In a bag in my freezer"