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Joke of the Day

"The only day of the year that gives an order March 4th Sorry this was one of my dear departed mother's favorite annual jokes. Just had to share the love!"

"Funny how we say ""I drank a *pot* of coffee"" instead of ""I drank fourteen cups of coffee and chased the cat around the hot tub with a sword"""

"Jewish Joke About Warm Weather . Dude. It was so hot, I swear that I'd convert to Christianity for the Baptism."

"I bought my son a trampoline But all he wanted to do was sit and cry in his wheelchair - This was a repost but I thought it was too funny not to share"

"Life is like a box of chocolates The fatter you are the shorter it lasts"

"The Three Words You Dread What are the three words you dread the most while making love? ""Honey, I'm home."""

"NIETZSCHE: god is dead! he remains dead! and we have killed him! ME AS NIETZSCHE'S LAWYER: your honour we're gonna need a recess"

"I met Phil Spector's brother Crispin the other day. He's head of quality control at Lays."

"Why did the hospital put all of their gynecologists on salary? Because the ova time was killing them."

"No coffee in the pantry this morning so I had to go outside and show my dick to a cop to get the old motor running."