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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend and I are in sync! Like the band. Or soap."

"Me: My flight was canceled so I won't be home until tomorrow. Her: but you said you were just going out for milk."

"my date canceled today, now when someone asks ""How was your date?"" I can say I was too *hand*some."

"I don't understand why women get so angry and stressed on their period. It's such an ovary action"

"Her lips said no, but her eyes said... read my lips"

"One of my employees took 6 months off work to get in touch with his inner child... ... he came crawling back"

"[OC] Time heals all wounds.. Unless you re a haemophiliac."

"A judge in Oklahoma City wed a couple and then sentenced the groom to prison. That sounds redundant to me."

"How does Stevie Wonder check Facebook? With his EyePhone"

"A man enters a pun contest... He writes down 10 puns and puts them into a hat thinking at least one of them would win. Sadly, no pun in 10 did."