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Joke of the Day
"My girlfriend and I are in sync! Like the band. Or soap."
Next Joke
"What's the best time to buy a bird? When it goes cheep!"
"Just found a hole in my sock and now I'm worried that the whole drawer might be pregnant."
"What do you call a midget physic that has escaped from prison?? A small medium at large"
"What type of food do firefly's love to eat? Light food."
"My friend told me to sing Wonderwall I said maybe."
"""You're not like the other girls."" ""Yeah, that's pretty much how this works. We're literally all different ones."""
"Operator: ""9-1-1 please hold..."" Me: ""Ok. Hey, stop stabbing me for a second."" Murderer: ""K."""
"I don't need a calendar to tell me winter is approaching *strokes wife's leg hair*"
"i'm just like one of the ladies in the commercials! dancin around with nair on my pits! usin a tampon as a mic as i lipsync the cranberries!"