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Joke of the Day

"I heard the chief of police on the news saying ""we will never forget 9 11"" I should bloody hope so its your phone number"

"If we put aside our differences and work together, I truly believe we can come up with a few more alternate spellings of the name Britney."

"Cheetah is not the fastest animal on the earth. If a cheetah runs after you, You will run faster."

"Putting juice in the fridge is fine but put it in the oven and you're literally Hitler"

"Why was the one y.o. Ethiopian child crying? Because he was having his mid-life crisis."

"What do you call a midget in a subway saying, ""tick...tick...tick...""? A metro-gnome"

"Why did the thief take a bath? To get a clean getaway"

"What do you call a gust of wind that blows a black guy off of a boat? The NBA draft"

"What begins with E, ends with E, and has one letter? envelope"

"Whenever I reach 88 mph in my car, I always make a Back to the Future time traveling sound effect inside my head... ...and that's usually followed by a police siren sound effect outside my car."