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Joke of the Day

"A seal walks into a club... Lets say that he got knocked up just a little to hard."

"Why do I praise Neo? Because I'm autistic xD XDXD"

"Tesla Motors started a brand of cologne. They call it Elon Musk."

"Where do animals go when their Tails fall off? The Retail store"

"In Germany, these are the three main fat groups: 1. Gesattigt Fett (Saturated Fat) 2. Trans Fett (Trans Fat) 3. Boba Fett"

"A bear and a rabbit are both taking a shit in the woods The bear says, ""Do you have trouble with shit sticking to your fur?"" Rabbit: ""No, not at all."" So the bear wipes himself with the rabbit."

"If I had a dollar for every girl I fucked ... ... I would be still fucking poor!"

"My wife used to get so fat that she had to go to the hospital; then a person would fall out of her. That doesn't sound normal."

"We've all heard of Whistler's Mother.... But what about Whistler's Father? I guess you could say that he's out of the picture."

"A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said, Keep off the Grass.'"