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Joke of the Day

"My relationship is like Monopoly. She gives me too many Chances."

"TRIVIA: The sinking of the Titanic in 1912 cost 1,502 lives. Adjusting for inflation, that would be over 8,500 people today!"

"The brownies I started making in my Easy Bake Oven in 1987 are ready if you guys want one."

"What type of transporter does Mr. Scott use? A Beemer."

"does anyone know a knock knock joke that's actually funny? most of the ones i have heard are not funny at all."

"Someone asked a man who had been married for 20 years Q: What did you do before you were married sir? A: *with teary eyes* whatever the hell i wanted to do ..."

"[Last Supper] Jesus: *holds up bread* This is my body *holds up wine* This is my blood And this is Sparta! *kicks Judas into a pit*"

"For all you World of Tanks players: what does LTP stand for? LeichtTractor Premium"

"Why don't you remove those barriers to imports? It will ease my inflation and the benefits will trickle down."

"What's the leading cause of death among wizards? Staff infection"