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Joke of the Day

"RIP Ronaldo's Moth. The world's most famous footballing insect has died after a long and illustrious career. He was 6 weeks old."

"What do you call a piece of pasta that doesn't have any friends? Cannelonely!"

"I don't know why people always make such a fuss about how much a newborn weighs. It's a baby, not a stash of cocaine."

"GW... You can say what you want about the Boron but at least he Phosphorus. Also, in jokes the comics _did_ Barium. edit: Hope you get it, Bromine."

"Do you know where the Belgium waffle design comes from? From the German tank tracks."

"I'd try to commit suicide, But I'd probably fail like the rest of my life."

"Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seatbelt."

"A Mexican magician was performing a magic show He said that he will vanish by the count of 3. So he started the countdown Uno Dos And then he vanished without a tres"

"Why is Edward Snowden still in Russia? The airport is Snowden"

"A woman is on trial... ...for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks, ""First offender?"" The lady replies, ""No your honor. First a Gibson then a Fender."" Edit: Grammar."