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Joke of the Day

"I hear Donald Trump wants every welfare recipient to take a drug test... I don't even what to know what he's planning to do with all those urine samples."

"What's in common between a sprinkler and the answer i got if she wanted anal? Tsk Tsk Tsk Tsk"

"What do you call a zombie musician? A decomposer."

"Chuck Norris has never been accused of murder for the simple fact that his roundhouse kicks are recognized world-wide as ""acts of God."""

"*first date (Me, texting) This is awful. She's boring, has no sense of humor & rude Her: You know you speak out loud when you text, right?"

"What do you call a Thu'um that makes a dragon orgasm? A Cu'um."

"TIFU by paying $7.99 a month to Hulu Plus instead of Netflix... Whoops, wrong sub."

"what are pee wee herman's favorite baseball teams? yanks and the expos"

"Jesus was on his way from heaven to Earth for the Second Coming, but his car broke down along the way. He was driving a Chrysler."

"Did you hear that someone put a hole in the fence at the nudist beach? Don't worry, the police are looking into it."