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Joke of the Day
"What kind of file do you need to turn a 8mm hole into a 40mm hole? A pedophile"
Next Joke
"No one is more unnecessarily confident than a white person that just ordered Mexican food in a Spanish accent."
"What do you get if you ask a bear to spare some of his salmon? The Bear Glare."
"When your momma taught you to look both ways she didn't meaa taught you to look both ways she didn't mean be two faced."
"Therapist has suggested yoga, for a calming, alternate state of consciousness. But its to much easier just to drink."
"If your bathroom sink looks like mine, you're disgusting and I'm a hypocrite."
"This self checkout lane has the sexiest cashier."
"If boys had uteruses... If boys had uteruses they would be called Duderuses. (from Bobs Burgers)"
"Why did the boy want to see a thunder storm in Greece? Because Greece lightening"
"Turns out you have to *tell* a guy you're going out, otherwise you just end up standing on his doorstep wondering why he's in his sweats."