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Joke of the Day

"I have separation anxiety so I date a boomerang. It always comes back to me."

"What is worse then a centipede with sore feet? A giraffe with a sore throat"

"My girlfriend doesn't want to drop acid with me. She's acting like a basic bitch."

"Let's emotionally damage each other and call it Love."

"What do you call a gay French baker? A faguette"

"Believe it or not, my wife and I were actually matched on Tinder. We'd been married for 12 years."

"I wore my golf socks today There's a hole in one"

"Just turned a corner and bumped into a woman with drawn-on eyebrows. I'm not sure which of us was more surprised."

"No plastic surgeon will help me! I have really giant hands and I'd like to make them smaller, but every time I ask the doctor for a hand-job I get kicked out."

"A feminist went to the police department. She said she wanted to file a report because someone called her fat. ""It's ok, just leave your thumb print on this broadsheet"""