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Joke of the Day
"Two women are at a cafe, sitting quietly"
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"whats the difference between cancer and black people? cancer got jobs. (too soon.)"
"Did you hear about the vertically challenged psychic that robbed a bank? Police say they're looking for a small medium at large."
"Sometimes all you need is $500 million dollars."
"My ex-girlfriend... Bent my car's hood,but it was my fault a little bit too I was just a little bit over the legal speed."
"What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a newspaper bag? One is made of plastic and poses a suffocation hazard to small children. The other one contains newspapers."
"""hey mister can i pet your dog?"" ""sure kid"" ""what kind is he?"" ""that there's a pure beef vienna son careful don't get mustard on your shirt"""
"No end in sight... I can't see an end. I have no control. I don't think there's any escape. I don't even have a home anymore. Time for a new keyboard."
"Have you seen the special message written at the bottom of a condom when you roll it all the way out? Me neither.."
"What do you call a beautiful woman having sex with a comedian? Pretty fucking funny."