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Joke of the Day
"Glad I spent 40 minutes getting my 1 year old dressed so she could go outside for 3 seconds."
Next Joke
"I hope the Orioles keep up their winning streak, Baltimore has been on fire lately."
"sweet potato fries ...could be made from sweet potatoes, or they could just be really awesome potato fries."
"Men are like placemats. They only show up when there's food on the table."
"How do you silence a group of women? Bring out your camera."
"What do you get when you cross a telephone with a pair of pants? Bell-bottoms!"
"Just read ""The Three Musketeers,"" and it's true, the book is always better than the candy"
"Why do cows wear bells? ...because their horns don't work."
"4yo: Raise your hand if you are young Me: *raises hand 4yo: No, daddy, not you."
"A joke I made up in middle school Why did Dairy Queen get pregnant? Because Burger King forgot to wrap his whopper!"