28010

Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones, but people in Abu Dhabidooo."

"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One I like to crush with a sledgehammer till juice squirts out, the other is a watermelon"

"Why are the reddit servers down so much? Because they're being beaten like a dead horse."

"Build a man a fire, he remains warm for the day But set a man on fire, he is warm for the rest of his life"

"Why do Scotsmen wear kilts? Because sheep can hear a zipper up to a mile away"

"Besides coke residue, what other particles can be found on dollar bills? Stripper poop particles"

"A recent worldwide survey showed... A recent worldwide survey showed that out of 7,146,703,436 people, 94% were too lazy to actually read that number."

"Whats the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law and the other is a sick bird"

"Last night I slept for 8 hours straight, and then for 2 hours gay."

"I forgive you, but I hope your death is written, produced, and directed by Quentin Tarantino."