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Joke of the Day

"What did the holy shit say to the priest? I'm glad I got the hell out of there!"

"What did Beethoven the dog shed in a moment of genius? Fur Elise"

"How many Buddhists does it take to screw a light bulb? None. They believe that the enlightenment comes from within."

"I went to a feminist picnic the other day... It was great, apart from the fact that no one made any sandwiches."

"To those who want to join the conversation. Don't."

"Did you hear about the fire at the cheese factory? Nearly a total loss... All that was left was de-brie."

"What's the difference between Paul Walker and my computer... I give a shit when my computer crashes."

"Scientists have recently created a new hybrid by mating a male donkey and a female deer. It isn't very beautiful, but that ass doe"

"Why do I wash my clothes in TIDE? ... because it's too cold out-tide."

"1. Pick jeans to wear 2. Pull them up to thighs 3. Pants dance for 3 minutes 4. Take pants off 5. Put sweatpants on 6. Cry, eat pumpkin pie"