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Joke of the Day

"Mention me in your will. Just give me a shout out or something."

"What would my hippie side be doing right now? I already know that"

"hey pregnant lady slowly crossing the street on a green light it's a baby not a forcefield"

"When I die I want my Group project members to lower me into my grave. So they can let me down one last time."

"Q: Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? A: Because drawing a perfect circle is impossible for any human."

"Me: I'm hot blooded check it and see got a fever of 103! 911: Did u call earlier about having a bad case of loving me? M: maybe 911: stop"

"My cat just winked at me and now it's awkward because I only see her as a friend."

"knife on a date When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date."

"If I am attacked by a group of clowns..... should I always go for the juggler?"

"What do you call a jungle where animals talk about current events? A topical rainforest."