26883

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a rogue toaster? A rebel appliance."

"Behold the nuclear arsenal of North Korea and Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un! The very Earth quakes in terror!"

"Almost 65% of statistics are made up. The other half are lies."

"I can see clearly now the rain has gone; I can *backs into mailbox* see all obstacles in my way *runs over squirrel* omg I love this song"

"Guy [beating me up for making a joke at an inappropriate time]: whos funny now you piece of shit Me: wait, you thought i was funny before?"

"What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ""K"" instead of ""OK""?"

"*crawls out of your television and tries to kill you* I'm not like other girls."

"How do you get pikachu on to a boat? You pokemon"

"Want to make a nerd's head explode? Go to any site that posted the new Star Wars trailer & write ""Where's Captain Kirk?"" in the comments."

"What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a rock climber? Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scalar."