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Joke of the Day

"Why doesn't anyone get laid on Thanksgiving? All the coats are on the bed!"

"use this coupon for the pizza its expired whats the worst that could happen [calls wife 10min later] hello Im in something called pizza jail"

"Dyslexic, but I have a cunning stunt."

"What have sex, money and depression in common? You don't talk about them, you have them."

"Ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolates... Stop right there, me! I'm under arrest for posting an unoriginal joke!"

"FUN PRANK: Bump into Kanye in public, pretend you don't recognize him, and say ""EXCUSE ME ORDINARY CITIZEN"" Then watch how mad he gets."

"Have I told you about my vacation to Oklahoma? It went fucking horribly."

"Why did the sick eagle get deported? Because he was an illeagle."

"Why did the Nevada skunk cross the state border? To follow the smell of legal dank skunk buds."

"My dog is called cigarette as he's got no legs Every evening I take him for a drag"