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Joke of the Day

"Joke What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob? Wife: ""I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""

"""It's not you, it's me."" - Humidity, to Heat"

"What's the difference between a ladder and a truck? It's no bad luck to walk under a truck."

"""I kid you not"" -Abortion doctor."

"Eat 70,000 small meals each day to keep your metabolism going strong."

"[undercover FBI agent who's had me under surveillance for weeks decides to blow his cover] do you ever stop eating?"

"What do Canadian squirrels eat? Eh-corns."

"me: this cat is kissing me on the lips because it LOVES me cat: mother's lips taste perpetually of bacon"

"Why are there no cats on mars? Curiosity"

"Have you heard about Beyonce's new perfume line, Beyotch?"