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Joke of the Day

"If I had a dollar for every time I got distracted while writing a paper; Id be making money in a weird ass way, man. ~Mitch"

"Q: Where does the catcher sit for dinner? A: Behind the plate."

"So, I just found out I got some black guys in my family tree... Went to the backyard and found them still hanging there."

"Canada has seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and construction."

"You know what keeps me up at night? Pauly Shore has turned down more hot women than I will ever, ever meet. Pauly. Shore."

"How do you say hi Hello"

"The hardest part of Hypochondriacs Anonymous is admitting you don't have a problem."

"Why did the sasquatch go on a diet? He didn't want to be Obeast."

"What do you call the guy that graduated last in his class at med school? Doctor."

"What smells bad and sounds like a bell? Dung! Get it?!"