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Joke of the Day

"The entire Dutch air force was disabled this week. The pilot was sick."

"Marriage is like a tattoo. You say it's for ever but we all know there are ways & means of ditching it. It'll just be painful and expensive."

"What's the difference between a lesbian and a vacuum cleaner? One is great with a carpet, the other one sucks my dick."

"Doctor doctor I keep thinking I'm a bee Buzz off can't you see I'm busy?"

"I freaked out my mailman today when I came to the door completely naked. I'm not sure what shocked him more, my naked body, or the fact that I knew where he lived."

"The basketball shot clock was invented in 1954 after a player hid the ball under his shirt for 48 minutes and told everyone he was pregnant."

"Some people are like base model cars, you can see the spots where all the normal stuff should be, but it's just never been installed."

"""Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she's a monster wearing a shit ton of makeup."" -Maybelline"

"What did one strawberry say to the other strawberry? If you weren't so fresh we wouldn't be in this jam."

"What did the Morman say when asked what kind of wives he wanted? ""Brigham Young"""