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Joke of the Day

"People keep telling me to start thinking for myself... I'm not sure what they want me to think about."

"Are knee pads... ... the perfect gift, for givers?"

"THe newiest Knock Knock joke I heard. - Knock Knock - Who's there? - First pilot. hopefully not too soon"

"Why did the girl give Jesus a blowjob? She wanted to see the messiah cum"

"Last night,my friend changed all my contacts in my phone.I've been texted by Batman Donatello,Hermione Granger.I have no idea who they are."

"Why was the glow worm unhappy ? Because her children weren't that bright !"

"What did the police officer say to the zoo keeper? Yeah I get it, I shoot monkeys on sight too."

"I feel sorry for Piers Morgan. He's basically Piers Morgan, trapped in Piers Morgan's body."

"A pirate goes to the doctor, worried the moles on his back are cancerous ""It's ok"" says the Doctor ""They're benign"" ""Count 'em again Doc"" says the pirate. ""I reckon there be at least ten"

"A baby seal walks into a club And later dies from complications of severe brain damage."