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Joke of the Day

"My boyfriend asked for a dirty pic last night, I was able to get my whole kitchen in the shot. That should last him a while! He's so weird."

"My favourite lawyer joke What do you call 10'000 lawyers chained together at the bottom of the ocean? A good start!"

"How do you get a nun pregnant? You fuck her"

"What's green and smells like bacon? Kermit's fingers"

"Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?"

"Why did Dairy Queen get pregnant? Burger King didn't cover his whopper."

"I buy all my guns from a guy that calls himself T-Rex... He's a small arms dealer."

"Why are muscles poisonous? Because my biceps are killer."

"A cannibal receives a call from his recently found brother. ""What a relief! I thought I passed you on the side of the road the other day."""

"I saw a van covered in dirt... I saw a van that was covered in dirt & someone had written ""I wish my wife was as dirty as this van"". I wrote ""she is-when you're at work!"""