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Joke of the Day
"What do you do if your girlfriend is choking ? Back up a few inches"
Next Joke
"Did you hear the joke about the jump rope? Eh nevermind, I'll just skip it."
"They say it's not the destination, it's the journey.........Except when you're heading to the bathroom with diarrhea..."
"TRUMP: I'm gonna lose, huh? RYAN: Yes. [silence] TRUMP: Thank God. RYAN: I know TRUMP: I'd be SO bad at it RYAN: We literally all might die"
"Why were 9/11 victims the fastest readers? They went through 87 stories in 10 seconds."
"Asked my co-worker if saw the big news report... He said which one, The Mac 'n Cheetos announcement or the UK doing something? True story, from 3 min ago... 'Murica"
"Wanna know how easy it is to sleep with a fat chick? Piece of cake"
"How did Watson and crick blow their chance with a hot girl? They said, ""baby you'd look good if you got a pair of skinny genes"""
"Why are black people like sperm? Only one in a million actually works."
"""I dunno, maybe you go steal an old lady's purse, you can hold up a liquor store, & you...just sit there looking mean."" -Unorganized Crime"