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Joke of the Day

"Doctors say that one piece of bacon takes 9 minutes off of your life. That has to be most delicious form of suicide I have ever heard."

"What do you call a black neurosurgeon? A Doctor you fucking racist."

"What do you call a camel with 3 humps? Pregnant"

"What's the difference between an Asian and a dumb white girl? The Asian try to get the A, but the white girl try to get the D"

"co-pilot: ""ask in a way that won't panic everyone"" pilot: ""ok"" [via intercom] ""is there a fireman on the plane?"""

"A man with Schizophrenia says: ""I used to be Schizophrenic... but now we're better."""

"[NSFW] Why is it so hard for a prostitute to pee in the morning? You ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese sandwich?"

"Him: Can you believe what's going on in Egypt? Me: Yeah...it's crazy...I gotta go. Bye. Me: *googles what's happening in Egypt?*"

"Batman walks into a bar..... followed by 13 sodium atoms...... (for all you chemists out there....)"

"I'm so sick of political jokes... I've seen too many get elected."