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Joke of the Day

"Danny DeVito... Danny DeVito is 70 years old, but he's had a short life."

"What's the difference between a Chick Pea and Garbanzo Bean?? I've never had a Garbanzo Bean on my face..."

"For Halloween, our daughter is dressing up as joke telling jack-o'-lantern. She's our little pun-kin."

"I now determine the days of the week based on Twitter. Is it Follow Friday yet?"

"If you were a dinosaur what would you be? Dead"

"What do you call a cheese that's not yours? My cheese!"

"Why did the bean sell his car? The back seat didn't have enough legume."

"Daddy, can I have another cup of water? ""Sure, son. But it's your 12th cup tonight..."" ""I know, the baby's room is still on fire."""

"What do you call a blind dinosaur? A Doyouthinkhesawus"

"GOOD COP: He won't talk except in sign language BAD COP: I just cut off his left hand BAD PUN COP: He still has the right to remain silent"