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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a fat chemistry professor? A significant figure."
Next Joke
"What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter"
"[wakes up from a 72-year-long coma] oh nazis are still a thing huh"
"How do you know when your girlfriend is putting on too much weight? She starts fitting into your wife's clothes"
"What do a dead vibrator and a moving bus have in common? You can't get off."
"How come Barbie never got pregnant? Ken always comes in a different box."
"I saw my sister watching the show ""Dexter"" yesterday.. I thought it was a pretty weird show, but then again, I have seen stranger things on Netflix."
"I like my women like I like my wine... ...locked in a dark basement for several years until they are mature enough to enjoy. Edit:yay made front page of the jokes!!!"
"One of my friends told me how electricity is measured And I was like watt?"
"[DUI checkpoint] Cop: I'm gonna need you to follow my finger Me: As long as it doesn't tweet inspirational stuff"