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Joke of the Day

"You can use your cat as a towel. There's no specific laws against it."

"When I call out the wrong name during sex, I just segue into singing Mambo No. 5."

"Croatian salary is like menstruation You get it once a month, it lasts 5-6 days and then you're fucked"

"Have you heard of this new drug? The DEA just passed a new controversial drug to help treat lesbians with depression. It's called Tricoxagan."

"I'm going to the bathroom to take a dump Can I get you anything?"

"My boyfriend is so bad at tongue-twisters, he can't even say ""I love you"" ONE times fast!!"

"TIFU by serving a hasidic man a footlong Italian BMT. Oops, wrong sub."

"What do you call a nosey pepper? jalapeno business"

"The penis game. Not technically a joke, but it's always fun. Just replace one word of a movie title with the word, ""penis"". Indiana Jones and the Temple of Penises"

"I had a detention for only using uppercase letters today Stupid capital punishment"