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Joke of the Day

"I repeatedly slapped my girlfriend as hard as I could at the concert last night. I was clapping for the band."

"Son asks his father... Son: Dad, how do you feel about abortion? Dad: Ask your brother. Son: But I don't have a brother. Dad: Exactly."

"classic germans Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control at Paris airport. ""Nationality?"" asks the immigration officer. ""German,"" she replies. ""Occupation?"" ""No, just here for a few days."""

"Frodo Baggins doesn't get Back Court Violations in basketball. He gets a There and Back Again"

"Autopsy confirms George Michael choked on a chocolate bar It was a Careless Whisper"

"Tinder isn't a babysitting app. Apologies to Crystal and Janine for the misunderstanding."

"If being sexy is a crime then I'm not committing one."

"Popcorn. Potato. Frozen Pizza. Cold Coffee. James Incandenza. Defrost. Refrost. Cancer. Corn. """"Aren't these weird microwave buttons?"

"Good Girls & Bad Girls! Difference Between Good Girls And Bad Girls Good Girls Open Few Buttons In Hot Atmosphere, But Bad Girls Open All Buttons To Make The Atmosphere Hot!"

"Use 'discount' in a sentence. Teacher: Johnny, please use ""discount"" in a sentence. Johnny: Yes ma'am, ""Does discount as a sentence?"""