23137

Joke of the Day

"Wife: You said you'll keep me as a queen but you make me dig the farm all day. WTF is this about? Husband: Darling you are my Queen of Spades."

"Two men were arguing when one goes: 'Come at me, you wanna fight? You can bring all your friends vs me'..... ... And then I'll beat up the BOTH of you."

"Somehow stumbled upon a nude beach. . Yeah, found myself in the middle of no wear."

"Never drink water after eating fish !!! Your stomach might become an aquarium. PS not mine read it somewhere"

"I quit a job re-writing pre-classical Greek literature into braille. This was months ago. It feels like ancient history."

"I have the heart of a lion.. ..and a lifetime ban from the Toronto Zoo"

"NSFW:Got a handjob from a blind girl last night She said ""You have the biggest dick I've ever put my hands on."" I said ""Nah. You're just pulling my leg."" Originally from r/meanjokes"

"College is just a clever marketing ploy by Starbucks and Red Bull"

"Ever since I started working out every day, I can really see a difference in how accomplished I am as a liar."

"What did the elephant say to the naked man? Dude, how the hell do you breathe through that thing?!?"