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Joke of the Day

"The Pokemon Champs The pokemon shooters should've blocked the exits if they wanted to be successful, ""gotta catch em all,"" remember!"

"I like my women like I like my wine 12 years old and locked in the basement Edit:I like most things without dicks aswell"

"Wait come back, I didn't mean it when I was just being myself"

"Q: Does a roller coaster like its work? A: It has its ups and downs."

"I bet our Founding Fathers never envisioned a Justin Bieber video getting heavy airplay on BET."

"My brother took being sent to prison really badly. He was yelling and screaming, took off his clothes, and would not accept any food from anyone. That was the last time we played monopoly."

"Say what you will about human beings, but we did invent ice cream."

"I'd be worried about my privacy settings on Facebook too if I had as many pictures of my ugly baby as you do."

"So an interviewer asked me where I saw myself in 5 years How should I know, I don't have 20/20 vision!"

"The nice thing about Hide-and-Seek is your children voluntarily go in a closet and be quiet for 3 hours."