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Joke of the Day

"Every tweet ever tweeted begins with an implied ""None of y'all asked my opinion, but ..."""

"A frog can leap higher than a house ..partly because of the strength of its hind legs, but also because houses have difficulty jumping at all."

"how did the Russian babysitter win the race? She got ahead LOL"

"A hipster guy is one who kept his grandpa's clothes but lost his grandpa's work ethic."

"I don't see how someone could mourn the loss of a Chinese dictator. It just seems unbereaveable to me."

"Need an ark? i Noah guy"

"If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? Pilgrims."

"Why did the cyclops quit teaching? He had only one pupil."

"Friend: If Nicki Minaj, Ke$ha, Nickelback, and Creed all died in a plane crash who would you miss the most? Me.. F... M.. F.. Me: the pilot"

"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, ""Hey - that's pretty cool. Where did you get him?"" The parrot says, ""Detroit."""