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Joke of the Day
"What do clouds want to be when they grow up? -Thunderstorms"
Next Joke
"Dentist: This is gonna hurt a little. Me: Ok. Dentist: I've been sleeping with your mom."
"How many physiotherapists does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just give the dead bulb some exercises to do and hope it will be working a bit better the next time they see it."
"This is the rare tweet that history will look back on much more favorably than how it was received in its own time period."
"If you don't let me in the bathroom, I can't guarantee your safety when you pee. ~dogs, apparently"
"Giving my liver a Rocky Balboa style pep talk"
"I like my women like I like my whiskey... ....15 years old and mixed up with coke."
"What mammal dies after it mates? Anyone that goes near my wife!"
"A boy goes into a stripclub... When he comes home, his mom asks him: ""Son, did you see anything you aren't supposed to see there?"" The son replies, ""Ya, I saw dad."""
"On one hand, eating meat is bad for your body, bad for animals and bad for the earth. On the other hand, bacon."