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Joke of the Day
"What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question? *Walks away*"
Next Joke
"What do you find in a pumpkins pants? A Halloweenie!"
"I'll be signing copies of my tweets this Friday at Barnes & Noble in Salt Lake City! Just meet me by the bathrooms at 5:30 & bring a pen."
"I almost had a threesome last night, All I needed was two more women."
"I was hitting the random button at the top what are the chances of getting ""Ask Reddit"" 10 times in a row?"
"How are expecting to cure cancer when we as a society can't figure out how to merge into traffic correctly?"
"I just ate lunch at a restaurant that calls french fries, 'Freedom Fries.' Thats just fucking stupid, pardon my freedom."
"It's awful being in a wheelchair everyone is always pushing me around and talking behind my back"
"""See that guy over there? I have to serve him with papers today."" -Oh really? Why? ""Because I lost my tennis racquet."""
"My daughter is at that awkward age where she doesn't want to wear the same dirty clothes to school all week long"