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Joke of the Day

"If I ever need to ask for directions, I will find an Asian person, because who better to help me get Oriented?"

"Me: *gazes into his eyes* Him: *sweats* M *winks* H: I'm kinda uncomfortable M: But this is love H: It's my job to fill liquor orders, ma'am"

"Finals come around and now you like the library? Name 3 of their songs"

"What is a bacteria's OTHER favorite dish? The PETRI dish!"

"I once farted in Apple store and everybody got pissed of... ...it's not my fault that they don't have Windows."

"What do you call masturbating on a plane Hi-jacking Never forget"

"I invented a new word... Plagiarism."

"eyebro What did one eyebrow say to the other eyebrow when leaving? Eyebro. I will see myself out."

"How do you catch a tame rabbit? The tame way -- unique up on him."

"You are dark and handsome; When it's dark,you are handsome."