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Joke of the Day

"In grocery store & guy grabs my hand,starts to walk.I go with him, till he turns & realizes I'm not his wife.We broke it off...Single again"

"Why does my son deserve some Reddit Gold? Because he's Autistic."

"Always the best looking one in the room. *Restroom **Restroom stall whatever"

"*handsome, young man walks up* HYM-Ms. Me-Hold it Jr. Yes, I'm sexy. But young guys aren't my thing. HYM-You've toilet paper on your heel."

"how many calories does hating your job burn"

"My entire existence is just me sitting around waiting to get hungry again"

"Hey girl are you like a gorilla exhibit? Cause I want to drop a baby in you."

"A nurse was showing some student nurses through the hospital. ""This will be the most hazardous section in the hospital for you. The men on this floor are almost well."""

"""Mother I'd like to fuck"" She said ""Ok, let's break your arms and get started."""

"How can a woman make you a millionaire? When you marry her as a billionaire."