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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the 13th century french dog that was a saint?... St. Bernard. Hiyooooooo."

"Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a pony; he stuck a feather in his hat, and called it macaroni... That folks, is what drugs do to you."

"Funny how shampoo bottles weigh like, 2 pounds in real life, but when dropped in the shower they turn into a meteor."

"The only ""B"" word women should be called is... is beautiful. Bitches love being called beautiful."

"I introduced my new girlfriend to my family last night... ""This is my dad Roger,"" I said, ""And this is my twin brother Dave."" ""Nice to meet you,"" she smiled. ""Who's the oldest?"" I said, ""My dad."""

"Does anyone know a good locksmith? I spent the entire day cleaning the entire house and need to keep my family out."

"I had all these small cheese squares but nothing to put them on. I was really cracka lackin'."

"The World's Shortest Joke Two women were sitting quietly."

"My black cat just ate my four leaf clover. That can't be good......."

"I'm too old to still be ""getting too old for this."" I've arrived."